Just a look, that’s all it was. A glance across a room, a sense of recognition saying, “I know you, I know that you are there, I know everything about you. I know your mouth is soft and warm. I know your smile, and I hear your laugh, what you sound like when you sing and when you cry and when you sigh and when you whisper. Where you go when you are sleeping. How you toss your head, and how you run your fingers through your hair. How you close your eyes. Touch me, touch me. Gently at first, then hold me, hold me like a bird. But I am touching you. I know.”
For the next few days, she tried to make herself believe she had been dreaming, absent, somehow missing from herself. After all, such things were often caught within the spiral of our dreams, the trickle of imagination, seized upon by thought and thrown about in some internal night. It had been at best a casual look, and maybe she had just imagined it. But she knew she hadn’t. Perhaps he hadn’t even been looking at her at all; maybe he was looking at someone else. But she knew he wasn’t.
Life went on as normal, but it didn’t. Her body was insane. Her mind was hurtling towards the sun. She hardly knew she was alive. Everything she did and said was charged with rampant sexual excitement. A beacon had been lit inside her, and it radiated hectic light.
She was relieved when all the new fittings for the hotel arrived in time for summer. She hoped being busy would take her mind away from thoughts of David. But it didn’t. She took several days to organise and itemise the new stock, and even longer to appropriate it. She was so tired at the end of every day she had no energy to think of anything at all, but she thought of David.
Just knowing he was there. Knowing he was waiting, as she was. Knowing there was sunlight on the sea. That great shattered night, the silken darkness that invades the sky and leaves it starless, the moon that shivers in the distance.
About the Book
Author: Hannah Carrow
Genre: Erotic Romance
Rachel is a young widow with two children. She meets David, a Catholic priest, and they are immediately attracted to each other in a shocking and powerful way. They experience an extraordinary and glorious love which, over time, develops into a mindless sexual obsession that bears witness to the complete disintegration of her mind and takes her to the edge of madness.
She felt a sense of wonder and amazement that she had come across a creature such as he. He wasn’t there and then he was, and he would always be. After all, such things were often caught within the spiral of our dreams, the trickle of imagination, seized upon by thought and thrown about in some internal night.
About Hannah Carrow
I am an artist living and working in London. I spent my late childhood years at boarding school in Cornwall. I have always loved the countryside and the sea. I later attended St Martin’s School of Art in London in the 1980s and was awarded a BA Hons Degree in Fine Art.
Like A Bird is my first novel. It has been a story that I have needed to tell for a long time. My son suggested I should write it as much of it is true. Now that I am in my early sixties I can look back upon my life and remember it as it was.